I’m thinking of W, who I’ll get to see on the 28th. He said next week, but I think he’s still delirious, slightly, from flying back from Tanzania.
I saw him Monday, walking downtown, while I was riding on the bus to work. I wanted to jump off but I was late that day, after dropping the morsel off, and wanted to get in and not be ridiculously late. And I knew he had just gotten back and was likely working or getting things taken care of. And anyway, I emailed him then the next talked to him on the phone and we made the date for lunch.
So sweet.
And by contrast, I went to help the morsel pack for her vacation with her dad, and he was there being his usual self. It’s so crazily difficult with him, I can’t believe we were married for so long. And he can make me upset so easily. But it’s mostly frustration, over how ridiculous and righteous he is and none of it even makes sense.
But I ran a bit on the treadmill, cleaned out the fridge and got my place cleaned up a tiny bit, which calmed me. I put away the little table that the morsel uses, took the legs off and slid it away beside the fridge. I stacked all her books out of the way. I picked up all my sewing patterns and notes off the floor, put my sewing machine where it goes.
Tomorrow may likely be the last day of this contract I’m on, since the thing has to go in the mail by 5PM. I’m not sure we can pull it off with all the linking I need to do on the pages and pages of supporting material, but we’ll figure it out. I’ll figure it out.
Things seem so complicated some times, but when I stop and let myself be quiet I can see how simple they really are.
